Cap'n Crunch Crunch Treasures. That's what.
Crunch Treasures is marketed as a less-sugary version of the classic Cap'n Crunch. The cereal itself is shaped differently -- in fact, if this is even possible, the pieces are sharper in your mouth than the classic variation. Upon first bite, I realized that this indeed tastes exactly like what is advertised -- Cap'n Crunch with "1/2 the sugar of regular Cap'n Crunch."
Translation? A bland mess in your mouth that slightly resembles a breakfast classic.
This just in. Sugary cereals are not meant to be healthy. This is no different than sugar-free Kool-Aid. Low-calorie Oreos. If you take sugar away from a sugary cereal, you're left with nothing.
In the future, I'll save my money and just chew on a piece of paper.